Like Me

I cut my hair not to please you,
but to please me.

I color it colors of the rainbow
to make me happy.

Not you.

I write to lighten my mind
not to humor you.

I empty my thoughts onto
the pages
my emotions taking shape
my mind emptying.

If you read my words
I don’t care.

If you like them,
if you hate them.

I wear black jeans
because in them
I am confident.

The colors I hide
my skin in
the fabrics I drape
myself in
are for me.

In them I am me.

I am not you.

If I work at home
If I work in a building.

At the end of the day
I’m the only one
It affects.

I have to drive
to work everyday.
Not you.

I have to pay
for the dye on my head.
Not you.

I am afraid
of the dark.

There are things
that scare me.

Small things,
not so small things.

They scare me
they live with me.

They sleep at the
foot of my bed,
they live out their days
in my mind.

I am scared of them.

I am not scared of you.

You.

You think you know me
You swear you can fix me.

I do not want
to be fixed.

I do not want
to be you.

I want to be me.
I want to dress like me.
I want to sing like me.
I want to write like me.

Not like you.

Let me
be me.

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These words were written ages ago, and just recently brought back and tweaked due to a conversation I had the other night with a dear friend.

We got on the subject of others and how judgmental they can be. Not when it comes to things like favorite colors or what movies you watch (though those things can be just as hurtful), but when people look down on you for the career path you choose, the job you have, and even how you choose to dress yourself!

We were able to shrug it off, knowing that those people that say those things have no right to. They can be hurtful, they can be rude and cruel, but in the long run their words mean nothing. Because they’re not the ones living our lives. We are. Our choice of a workplace, our choice of not going to school doesn’t affect them.

So while their words can feel like knives that dig oh so deep some days…

They’re really just empty and pointless.

Doesn’t fix the problem. Doesn’t stop the words from coming. But it does make it a little easier to ignore.

Well, that and some loud music.

One thought on “Like Me

  1. Hello lovely lady, I have not seen any of you wonderful people. By the time we meet again to have coffee or tea you will have forgotten all your adventures. So it is good that you write them down even if you have to tweak them. I am going to the beach the 7th to the 11th and I will try to take time to have a cup of Apple Cider and pretend that I am that girl ^. lol. Love you all.

    Liked by 1 person

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